Friday, February 15, 2013

Week End Update: Kim, Jessica and Christina

As was first revealed by the long-legged blond gal at Trulia Luxe Living, preggers reality t.v. star and tabloid catnip Kim Kardashian has quietly sold her five bedroom and 4.5 bathroom faux-Tuscan micro-mansion (above) in the Beverly Hills Post Office area in an off-market deal for an (as yet) undisclosed amount of money. Avid celebrity real estate watchers will recall that Kimmy bought the 3,799 square foot house in late February 2010 for $3,400,000.

Property records show the (as yet) unrevealed buyer is shielded behind a generically named corporate entity, an LLC. That's not so strange, really, but what is a bit curious is that Your Mama quickly used the powers of the interweb to link the newly formed LLC back to a P.O. Box in Jupiter, FL well as to a tiny and somewhat bedraggled bungalow in the Parker Ridge neighborhood in West Palm Beach, FL. Go figure.

So the celebrity real estate scuttlebutt goes, not-quite-divorced K.K. and her notoriously magniloquent baby daddy Kanye West are set to drop a wad on an even bigger, 9,000-ish square foot mock-Med macmansion with five bedrooms and seven bathrooms in the guard gated Beverly Crest 'hood. As of this morning the property in question is currently in escrow, according to online listings, and was last priced at $10,750,000.

In other real estate news about another unmarried and rapidly procreating famous lady...

According to the celebrity gossips at Us magazine, pop music starlet turned reality t.v. star turned mid-priced apparel mogul Jessica Simpson and her former professional football player man-friend/baby daddy Eric Johnson are indeed in escrow on Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne's mini-compound (above) in the guard gated, equestrian oriented and star-studded community of Hidden Hills, CA for somewhere close to its $12,999,000 asking price.

Mister and Missus Osbourne paid $12,388,500 for the 2.25 acre estate and its 10,930 square foot contemporary farmhouse-style mansion that they subsequently hired hilariously affected Million Dollar Decorator Martyn Lawrence Bullard to work over in his signature high-glam style. The house was photographed for the June 2011 issue of Architectural Digest but the rock-n-roll royals soon caught a case The Celebrity Real Estate Fickle and flipped the estate back on the market in June 2011 with it's first and only asking price of $12,999,000.

Mister and Missus Osbourne long ago moved back over the hill, first to a leased pied-a-terre at Sierra Towers building in West Hollywood and then to a stunning Spanish style rental in the flats of Beverly Hills that's owned by one of the Platinum Triangle's most successful and well known real estate agents.

Miz Simpson has long owned a foliage enshrouded house in same secluded Beverly Hills (Post Office) where other homeowners and residents include (but are not limited to) Tinseltowners like Cameron Diaz—who bought her compound from Candice Bergen; Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem—who bought their modestly sized house from Sara Gilbert and her former lady mate and baby momma, writer/producer Allison Adler; And actress Nicole Kidman and her country crooner hubby Keith Urban—who bought their West Coast pied-a-terre back in 2008 from music executive Ron Fair.

In other real estate news sort of related to Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne....

Back in August 2007, Christina Aguilera and her then husband Jordan Bratman shelled out $11,500,000 to acquire a walled and gated Beverly Hills mini-estate owned and made famous by rock music legend Ozzy Osbourne and his manager/wife tuned t.v. presenter Sharon Osbourne. Mister and Missus Osbourne made the house a well known stop on every celebrity real estate tour after it was featured prominently in the early to mid Aughts on the family's long ago ended reality program The Osbournes.

X-tina doesn't appear to have changed much on the outside but the 10,000-plus square feet of interior space was transformed by the L.A.-based decorating duo (Ron) Woodson & (Jaime) Rummerfield into a kaleidoscopic cornucopia of rich and vibrant colors, mixy-matchy patterns, lush textures and madcap celebrity-style accoutrement that include a boutique-like dressing room with leopard print wall-to-wall carpeting and a private beauty salon.

In March 2011, a bit more than six months after X-Tina and Mister Bratman publicly called off their marriage, the property popped up on the open market with a $13,500,000 price tag. Well, don'tcha know, children, it's only taken two years—or just shy of two years, anyways—to unload her residential white elephant but yesterday the status changed from "active" to "pending" on all the online real estate listings. As the inestimable Shangela Laquifa Wadley of the Houston Wadleys from RuPaul's Drag Race might say, "Halleloo!"

Although we've been told she's beefed up her house hunt in the last few weeks and would be willing to spend in the low eight figures on her new digs, as far as Your Mama knows X-Tina has yet to select her next residence.

all aerial images: Pacific Coast News

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Low 5 figures for Ms. X-Tina? Me thinks a typo is afoot.

Anonymous said...

I can't help but think that life would be so much simpler for them if Kim, Jessica, X-Tina and the Osbournes formed a co-op or REIT of some kind that owned all their homes. Then they could agree to rotate every 3 years or so. It would save tons of money on real estate sales commissions not to mention the fluctuations in housing prices.

Anonymous said...

Didn't you just love the days when these stars or 'stars' had the money to buy a proper house? Now all we have is the fabulous Yolanda Hadid Foster, who weirdly kept her surname from the previous marriage, with bucketloads of divorce money, saying she can't afford a second horse for her daughter or a $700 an hour lawyer. What kind of house can you afford then?

lil' gay boy said...

Yolanda is a bit of an "odd duck" -- ol' stick in the mud one minute ("drunken women are so unclassy") -- next minute she's slamming down a tumbler of tequila.

I suspect she kept her ex's surname for the sake of their children; as for not being able to afford another horse for her daughter, I'm guessing she's got a system for determining what to spend & on what to avoid spoiling them (you ever hear how she talks to the one who models?) And she did negotiate that painting down almost 50% ($14K to $8K).

With what she must have walked away from after Mohammed, plus David's unending royalties, it beggars belief that she cannot "afford" solid gold kegel balls, let alone a horse...

Anonymous said...

Where does Jessica Simpson get $13mil for a house????

Anonymous said...

12:39 Jessica Simpson poops money due to her various brands. You obviously dont follow this Blog.

Anonymous said...

12:39 Jessica Simpson poops money due to her various brands. You obviously dont follow this Blog.

Anonymous said...

Precisely, Li'l Boy. I have nothing more to add. They both must be full of cash. If what you can read online is true, her divorce settlement included a mansion in Malibu, a house in Santa Barbara, a fleet of cars, which includes an Escalade and a Range Rover, $30,000 in child support per month and a $3.6m cash payout. OK, I get it that she likes that nothing-special house in Malibu and its surrounding lemon garden, but come on: with that you cannot afford another horse and a lawyer? I don't think so.

Her Dutch upbringing certainly has something to do with the whole matter.

Anonymous said...

Did she and David build that house on land from Mohammed?
She also probably cannot afford another horse because she uses the child support for that since Mohammed pays for schools and nannies.
I'm sure it's equal for the three kiddies, outside of school sports, clothes, and incidentals, that 10k a month probably just provides enough to stable a horse, jet set around to model, and whatever the other kid is into.

Anonymous said...

I have always hated that house Jessiica Simpson is buying from the Osbournes. Just god awful on so many levels, not the least being that the Osbournes hired Martin Bullard to do over the interior. He had to be one of the least appropriate designers for that particular house. Of course, the house's "architecture," which is a mess of New England shingle style, never seemed the least bit in sync with the Osbourne's taste, so why they ever bought it in the first place is a mystery. Once again, I suppose we have to chalk it up to the fickle nature of the rich and famous. They seem to have for all intents and purposes moved back into town soon after they finished it.

Anonymous said...

@11:23
With three vacant lots on the same street and many more in the Ashley Ridge section I wonder why they don't just build something.

Anonymous said...

Lil', tonight they're airing Lisa's former house fire!

Cutie_one4ever'12 said...

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Anonymous said...
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lil' gay boy said...

Anon 12:25:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNnAvTTaJjM

Saw it; methinks Ms. Maloof went a tad overboard...

Anonymous said...

Agree 100% gay boy!
They couldn't even buy some aerial video? We saw the smoky roof loop like 500 times!

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